"We run after values that, at death, become zero. At the end of your life, nobody asks you how many degrees you have, or how many mansions you built, or how many Rolls Royces you could afford. That’s what dying patients teach you."
Elisabeth Kubler Ross wrote that and she should know for she spent a good deal of her life studying death and dying. (see: www.elisabethkublerross.com and www.ekrfoundation.org )
I am beginning to understand that all we can do is let life flow through us, take its offerings and turn them into positive outcomes if they are not that already. It has taken me a long time to realize the more you resist, the longer and more tedious the ride.
The art of living in the moment is surrendering to that moment.
A teacher friend said something to me in discussion not too long ago that was so profound. He said that he didn't like talking about a students “potential”, the reason being that he wanted the student to know how good he/she was in the here and now. The word “potential” to this teacher meant a possibility in the future, rather than pointing out that the student was capable of anything now. This hit such a cord with me.
We are taught to set goals, to always look ahead, plan for the future, and think about tomorrow. Our whole culture is about tomorrow. Its no wonder the concept of living in the now is such a difficult idea for many to wrap their head around. Add the request to surrender to that moment and there is a total blank look on most people's face.
In accomplishing a task sure, there should be no retreat, no surrender. You have a test, you study to get a good mark. You want a bicycle you have to save your money to purchase it. But, in living for the moment, falling into the experience and unconditionally accepting what that experience has to tender, we must give that moment our undivided attention. In this case, surrender does not have to represent defeat, rather, surrender is seen as a challenge to one's fortitude at being able to let go to the here and now.
Let me give you an example. There are many times when I take my camera with me and I see a breath taking scene and a remarkable photo-op. But sometimes I stop before I put the camera to eye and realize that I don’t want to share the moment with anyone, I want to live the moment. So I put my camera down and just feel the beauty of what I see. This same teacher friend I wrote about above, told me that he never bought a video camera even though people hounded him all the time about the moments he would be unable to capture by not having one. It was his belief participating in his child’s activities, his family life, left a wonderful and long lasting memory, not only in his mind and heart, but he hoped, in his child’s.
Let me give you an example. There are many times when I take my camera with me and I see a breath taking scene and a remarkable photo-op. But sometimes I stop before I put the camera to eye and realize that I don’t want to share the moment with anyone, I want to live the moment. So I put my camera down and just feel the beauty of what I see. This same teacher friend I wrote about above, told me that he never bought a video camera even though people hounded him all the time about the moments he would be unable to capture by not having one. It was his belief participating in his child’s activities, his family life, left a wonderful and long lasting memory, not only in his mind and heart, but he hoped, in his child’s.
For a few years now I have been reading quotes from a Zen page ( www.dailyzen.com ) and for years I never could understand the value in the old masters writing about “singing rivers”, “sunlight streams” and “walking though mountain clouds”. Recently it occurred to me that these masters were talking about the simple daily things we take so for granted because we in our culture are racing around trying to keep up with the pace and expectations of this fast paced world we live in. Simple things like the canola fields I pass as I walk the dog every day. They are beginning to ripen and their bright yellow hue is a beautiful contrast to the deep green of their stalks. They lay at the foot of a mountainous backdrop and the whole scene is just simply beautiful. Wind blowing but it is warm and quite fine for it keeps the mosquitoes at bay. Dog bouncing along the path as I walk, he loves to be walked, and the sun setting behind ominous clouds, an indication of more rain yet to come. A most beautiful and serene moment to be sure.
Tomorrow when you are racing around, really do stop to smell the coffee, or roses, or your child’s freshly washed hair, the bakery you pass every day, dew on the grass... take one moment and breath it in, live it. This is what you take with you when you leave this planet.
"There is no need to go to India or anywhere else to find peace. You will find that deep place of silence right in your room, your garden or even your bathtub." ~EKR~
2 comments:
Sandy, I LOVE this post! You are right on the mark here. And that's one of the reasons I decided to take early retirement - teaching is SO trying, busy, stressful, and exhausting physically, mentally, and emotionally. I never had anything left IN myself FOR myself. The old saying about "life is short" is so true and I realized that I didn't want to work at that job until I was 65 and perhaps by that time be too ill or frail or whatever to do the other things I desperately want to do with my life.
From when Brian died to now, I've worked to raise my girls and earn a living so I didn't have to touch the money he left to me. Now, I feel it is the right time to let him help me to enjoy the next several years until social security kicks in. I'm ready to stop and smell the roses, hear the ocean lap at the seashore, see the sunrises and sunsets at the beach, feel the texture of sand beneath my bare feet, etc. I am ready to move forward, never forgetting but rather grateful that we had the years we did.
Your words here just created a little zen moment for me sitting in my office cube on a Wednesday morning. Ohm.
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