“I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don’t even invite me.”
~Dave Barry~
Nick and I argue all the time. Drives me absolutely crazy. When he argues he is loud and obnoxious. I guess he figures the louder his voice and the meaner the words he might get his point across. Me, I throw things, stamp my feet a lot, start to cry, go to my room and hours later come out to eat a whole box of Oreo cookies. (They’ve finally come out with vanilla Oreo’s like in the Girl Guide cookie boxes we buy once a year… big mistake she thinks as she downs half a box.)
Normally I get into argument mode when I am “running with the hormones” so to speak. This is when I am least tolerant and most vulnerable regarding frustration. Sometimes I go into argument mode when I want something to go my way and it isn’t. (A close friend of mine has observed this and commented that when he sees me acting as a spoiled brat he refuses to have anything to do with me… “blaaa” to you too!)
Nick frustrates me all the time. I think it is a parent-child thing. Seems to me I had least resistance from him when he was two than I do at twenty-two. Why are they always nicer to their friends, help out at other peoples homes, yet won’t pick up a stitch in their own home? Or are far more polite to neighbours than their Mother and still expect Mother to help out… on their terms when they want it I might add?
I have tried pretty much everything with Nick, love, tough love, sending him away, embracing him, helping him out, leaving him to fend on his own. I can honestly say I know now how Rodney Dangerfield felt!!!!
I GET NO RESPECT!!!!
Ah but I truly believe he will eventually realize that outside of his own remarkable qualities (which, I might add he is yet to acknowledge), his Mother is his most valuable asset! Am I expecting too much? Is this a pipe dream? Stay tune to find out.
Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about. ~Rodney Dangerfield~
I suspect when Nick and I look back in time at all the arguing we did, the above also will be true.
1 comment:
Hi Sandy, I have found that when my daughter wants a fight, she will pick and pick and pick at me until I respond. However, lately, I have simply acknowledged to myself that she is 26 years old, knows right from wrong, is hormonal at times, and as do most people attack the ones they love the most. So...what do I do? I do not respond - at all. If she follows me around, I just quietly go up to my room, close the door, and watch TV or continue reading my book or whatever. She cools off a lot faster and we never speak of it. This is the daughter who still has problems surrounding the death of her Dad (when she was 12!). I know that we should expect respect at all times, but frankly, I don't think these kids are capable at times of showing that to us because of what they've been through. Your son is probably lashing out at you because of his own grief and doesn't know any other way to express himself. (Who am I to know anything, other than what I've been through myself?) Best of luck dealing with the situations he throws at you. Try not responding and be consistent about it. It took a long time for us, but now my daughter knows I won't tolerate her abusive words so she doesn't do it nearly so much anymore.
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